miles to go

miles.
often what have defined my days and weeks, my lows and peaks. there's been a constant of building and recovering for the past two years with a few weeks of breaks in-between.

but like the draught in the state i call home, i am living with one personally; a mileage draught. i am not injured or recovering, not any more anyway. i am building slowing in every which way. in mileage and in pace i am embarking in a conservative approach. my mind fighting me every day, my body confused between what it deeply wants and what it really needs.

can one still be an ultra runner without massive mileage in weeks, maybe months?

my feeds have been less and less crowded with running photos.

my friend jack cried out one morning,
"can't we just run and have it be fun?'

then there's the coyote bushido,
"if you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong."

there are two count-downs which i have not looked into in weeks that mark the only two races i am planning on for the rest of the year. i have been reluctant to see their shrinking numbers.

part of being an ultra runner, a huge part, is mental.
if i can stand to train my mind in times of uncertainty, i have taken a step in the right direction. a step of continuos forward motion.

i know i am strong, though i am not at my strongest right now.
i know that i am resilient and resourceful, powerful and determined.

miles.
for i have a vision of crossing a certain finish line with a smile and some tears.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,   

But I have promises to keep,   

And miles to go before I sleep,   

And miles to go before I sleep.

Robert Frost